Please forgive an overdue and fairly rambling midweek post, I’m juggling a few things at the moment while trying to keep older stories organized and unfolding so I can redirect focus to newer tales currently evolving. Namely, the Armie Hammer and Marilyn Manson plot twists that the media doesn't seem to be tracking with much-invested interest. But what's new?
And then, just when I thought things might be coming to a lull this month, Trump popped up over the weekend to warn us of his impending arrest, encouraging protests (in all caps, as the old folks do,) so with all the drama on Twitter following this announcement (everyone fighting everyone) I got sucked in and couldn't peel myself away. I do this often. I get lost in tangents and rabbit holes I don’t have time for, and sometimes it works to my advantage, but more often than not, it leaves me frazzled and stressed to the point that my brain feels like it might short-circuit trying to keep these newly gleaned details aligned and intact.
I’m at that point now. But the memes are pure brilliance.
Surely, I don’t have time for Trump's antics but I’m dying to understand the strategy behind this push for indictment. Of all the corruption plaguing DC, is a 130K pornstar payoff really our top concern? If so, are we supposed to now forget about the Clinton paid Dossier scandal too? For the life of me, I can't figure out why the left thinks an arrest is a wise move considering this same legal threat has only helped bolster Trump's popularity in the past. Don’t they not want him to win?
I don't have any personal stake in the outcome, I think everyone involved in politics right now is clincially insane, but I'm still a sucker for dramatic plots & theatrics, so consider me regretfully engaged from here on out.
But also, was there ever a better excuse to drag us through the backlog of affairs and payoffs attached to politicians over the past two decades and beyond? Out of all the infamous scandals and mistresses, the tragic story of Chandra Levy (somehow stripped from our consciousness) is the most disturbing. My brief recap on IG reminded me of it. It definitely deserves a deep dive considering the murder, to this day, is still unsolved. If you recall, in the early 2000s, the story had the whole nation gripped. A young woman with a promising future in DC working as an intern for the Federal Bureau of Prisons disappeared without a trace during a jog in the summer of 2001. Her murder dominated the media after rumors of her affair with Gary Condit, an older married congressman, were revealed. Her sweatpants were found eerily tied into two tourniquets and became a key piece of evidence in the case, but her remains decomposed for over a year before discovery was made due to "miscommunication," with the Metropolitan Police Department of the District of Columbia failing to follow its own search parameters in Rock Creek Park. Eventually, a man was arrested and charged with her murder but later released when new information (which is where the story gets wild) emerged, clearing him of any involvement in her death.
Essentially, what started as a circus ended as a circus.
But as for the indictment. Is it just another distraction? To pull focus away from the bank collapses and the fact that we are teetering on the brink of WW3? Anyone notice how cozy Putin and Xi Jinping were last week? Putin hosted Xi for dinner at the Kremlin and flaunted this new kinship with a powerful ally just days after the international courts called for the Russian president's arrest over war crimes in Ukraine. Does anyone else find this absolutely terrifying - or just me and Russel Brand?
Before the Trump hoopla snagged my attention, I spent a good chunk of my weekend connecting with new and old sources (from Hollywood to DC) about various topics, which is the beauty of my life these days — unexpected phone calls that arrive without warning wanting to discuss unexpected topics without me willing them. I never know what I’m going to get.
One source called to inform me of details related to another story but mentioned in passing conversation that Jack Nicholson is currently in a “very fragile state,” and possibly not expected to make it “much longer.” She also humored me with tales of his regular invitations to threesomes hosted at his house.
“I’m not prepared to be grieving my favorite man in Hollywood this weekend,” I told her. But his ailing health has been on my radar since another source (close to Keaton) said Diane had to stop her regular visits to his home on Mulholland Dr. last year because he was “too far gone" and the whole scene became just too depressing for her to deal with.
And because we like connecting themes — get this: another source who is friendly with a member of Jack's orbit told me a couple of months ago that Trump’s loss sent Jack into deep despair. According to the source, Jack was so gutted by Trump's defeat - what he saw as "America's last hope" - that he grew very depressed and increasingly reclusive, which of course led to other unfortunate circumstances regarding his mental and physical well-being.
Note Cindy Adams behind Jack and Paul Simon next to him / favorite schmoozing era!
Knowing what I do about Jack, it adds up. He's long been one of Hollywood's most prominent conservatives. I distinctly remember learning this in junior high thanks to a tabloid page that divided celebs by their party ties. His anti-abortion stance landed him at the top, and the Baldwin brothers and Clint Eastwood, I want to say, below him. Hollywood rebels then and now.
What's funny is how celebrities nowadays like to confess republican tendencies to me knowing that I won't judge or "expose" them for sharing some conservative values. The bright side in that: everyone in real life, off-screen, when moral police aren't watching, is really just tired of the divisive bullshit and not nearly as one-sided in ideals as social media still wants us to believe. Proof is in the DMs.
Spoiler alert: everyone thinks Sam Smith is annoying.
— As far as legal highlights are concerned —
Gwyneth Paltrow is currently in Utah smirking and scoffing her way through a week-long trial to determine who is at fault in this very YASPY ski collision situation already deemed "The Whitest Crime on the Internet." So far, she seems to have taken a note from Martha Stewart’s lookbook of understated courtroom wardrobe selections. Sleek and and simple with undone hair. She can pull off the Jeffery Dahmer eyeglasses too, but still looks smug because of too many eye rolls and terse-lipped reactions caught on camera. And today we have new complaints about how close that camera is her face. Clearly, she is uncomfortable in that room, which always makes me question an actors ability, seeing them fumble so bad in a court setting. Isn’t this what you do? As I’ve said before, my feelings on Paltrow sway. I don't hate or love her. But, if she really did respond to a man's lifeless body as an effect of this collision by saying "I’m famous" as she is accused, may the court of public opinion eat her (and that poshly inscribed notebook she uses to hide her expensively moisturized face) alive. In the meantime, expect more court style musings here.
Stephen Smith's death is now being investigated as a homicide, officials confirm.
“The Fugee, the Fugitive and the FBI” - A trial described as “one of the century’s great financial scandals, mediated a high-stakes negotiation between global superpowers” has almost no media picking up and is set to begin next month. I’m going to need a lot of help if I expect to understand, dissect and explain this one for you.
I woke up at 4:45 yesterday to another storm and took a train ride to a stunning mid-century courthouse in L.A. to see - what could have been the trial of the season: Post Malone in court over a songwriting credit/royalty dispute for his hit song "Circles." Instead, I sat and listened to a judge argue with six attorneys for an hour about joint authorship in songs and whether humming or singing a guitar solo counts for song credit and royalty payout. The scene was especially entertaining because while they were discussing this scenario (singing silly ditties out loud to one another) the guy suing Post was on the stand cradling a shiny fender guitar & mic, tuning for soundcheck. Even though he apparently never played these 2 chords on a guitar when the this late night jam session, at the center of this lawsuit, took place. It was GOING TO BE A LITTLE CONERT TRIAL! Post popped in briefly mid morning to greet his lawyer and flash a sweet smile at the gallery, clad in a super slim navy suit, and I nearly gasped because he is startlingly thin in person, almost to the point of being unrecognizable. I'm talking Dylan in peak amphetamine era thin, but still strikingly beautiful with that angelic face (etched by awful tattoos), full lips, pale skin, light blue eyes, and a hunched but humble posture. He's tall and adorable. His new baby's mother (who was in court with him yesterday) is too. But the comments about how "healthy" he is are naively cute misconceptions from those who must not realize the prolific effects of Ozempic - cutting all of our stars in half this year. Personally, I miss a thick-thighed Post Malone, but I'm happy he's happy. He ended up abruptly settling the lawsuit just minutes before the jurors were set to be selected, which shocked and disappointed us all there to write about it, but nothing is ever a wash in court. There is always a story to shape. And in this case, early dismissal meant I got to gossip in the hallway for an hour with a veteran sketch artist I adore because she is ruthlessly candid and always has quality remarks about famous folks and the trials she’s documented. Details about Ghislaine’s infamous prison haircut, one of the main topics that hour. But fodder for another post.
Keeping on brand here: I’m headed to a cocktail party tonight in LA to celebrate my friend Leigh’s latest photo endeavor honoring “boss women” hosted by Laura Wasser. Wasser, or, the “Disco Queen” as she’s known, is a fierce and photogenic force in the courtroom herself. Amazing to watch in action. I saw her defend Kim during the Kanye divorce hearings, but ended up more focused on her shoes and later - her home decor. As seen here.
Thank for your patience. I’ll catch up on everything soon, I promise.
I HAVE TO.
Jessica, no need to apologize 💛 Your stories are the best. It’s always a treat to hear your insights and insider tips!
I just adore you! Thank you for being so authentic and honest. It is so refreshing. I feel like a kid on Christmas morning every single time your latest post pops into my inbox.
Thank you for all you do.