Upon A Summer Text Thread: Hot Takes & Inspiration

We were all home together as a family for a brief week. Rex Kraus returned from Mexico with a third-place trophy shaped like a chicken and five staples in his forehead—another summer, another surf injury to tend to.

Today, four of us are headed to New York for work and play, while Arlo is off on a post graduation backpacking trip through Europe with friends. The exotic excursion is funded mainly by a whole season of ice cream sales last summer, padding his savings to nearly 20K. At our lunch meet-up the previous week to settle the remaining details before they left, each mother contributed miscellaneous items to the group. I threw in a pack of disposable cameras. Turner's mother provided a box of condoms, testing strips, and Narcan. Please pray for his safety and my sanity when they make it to Ibiza?

As for New York, we are staying uptown on this trip for the first time. Baby Margot will be joining us. Hayes, our only other big-city enthusiast (Margot's adoring second cousin), has vowed to serve as her personal tour guide. He's editing their itinerary now as I type.

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Keeping Up With The Kennedys

For months, Bobby's wardrobe and styling have been a sporadic point of discussion in one thread. We love him and his penchant for skinny sea animal-printed ties, but we’ve been trying to figure out how to manifest him in a Canadian tuxedo, and lo and behold, he turned up at a recent event in just that, looking like a real Ralph Lauren-themed American icon. I swear to God, if he adds the same wayfarers his uncle and father wore, it's game over, kids.

Photos by @photo.conscious

Speaking of — really, all I want is a long summer highlight to kick up our heels and gaze at a broad curation of nostalgic images of JFK Jr. and CKB on vacation during the early days of their love affair captured in various scenes around Cape Cod. But that's always been me. I'm predictable when it comes to seasonal things.

Wondering: Is this or is this not a young hot Bill Clinton eating Wheat Thins next to Hilary, Jackie doppelgänger, and Ted Kennedy?

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In Entertainment

I know we were already severely irritated by Hollywood as a whole, but we may have reached our breaking point when George Clooney and Julia Roberts proudly stepped forward on IG this weekend trying to sell us a crumbling Joe Biden stuffed into a suit for his latest campaign gala. Fittingly enough, Julia turned off comments, and George returned home to another country after it was over.

Again. Thanks for nothing, guys.

Additionally, there is mounting interest in Angelina Jolie's new phase as a single mother trying to break ties with a man whose face now haunts her on half the children she’s housing. She stepped out on the Tony's red carpet yesterday in a stunning gown with her daughter, Vivienne, looking like a cocktail waiter in training. For the record, I didn't notice. Friends in other text threads noticed. So, hate on them for asking why this woman arrives at every award show looking like a goddess and her daughters like hired help.

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Demi Moore's Father's Day tribute to Bruce Willis is possibly the only pure thing in entertainment right now.

Marc Jacobs' IG is suddenly (entirely) dedicated to the click-clacking of his extra long acrylic nails, and weird as it is, I can’t say I hate it. But I, too, am semi-addicted to internet ASMR at the moment, so color me enthralled. Livy’s layered sounds are my favorite.

Because I know you guys like the topic of clones: I present Reese Witherspoon's daughter, Ava.

As for Julia Fox, I keep going back and forth, trying to decide if I love or loathe her. Thanks to the ladies on text this morning, we concluded it's love. Especially after seeing her humble apartment tour. "I want him to be in touch with the fucking real world," she says about her babe. Good for you, Julia. In a world of gross Kardashian excess, good for you.

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RELATED: BUD’S HOLLYWOOD RANT “Famous People Suck!”

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Current Summer Inspo (Mind and Body)

Languish in Luxury

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P.S.

Leonardo DiCaprio’s ex girlfriend Camila Morrone is doing just fine without him.

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If you know any spots or sights to see in Uptown - feel free to pass them along!